Aquamarine

Emma Roberts in Aquamarine.

It was a rainy day and we were trying to find a suitable movie for the whole family to watch. That's not real easy. We settled for Aquamarine. It was the last pick that was ratings acceptable. We should have found some reruns to watch instead.

Aquamarine is about a couple of young girls who pine and swoon over a lifeguard, Raymond, who is several years too old for them. Claire lives with her grandparents, who have a business on the beach. Hailey lives with her single mom who keeps moving. She plans on relocating to Australia so this will be the last few days the girls will have together. While spending the night at Claire's, a storm comes through and deposits a mermaid, Aquamarine, into their pool. The girls find her and the mermaid tells them that they will get a wish if they help her find true love. The girls see a way to stay together, so they agree to help her. However, Aquamarine has the hots for the same lifeguard that Claire, Hailey and apparently every other girl in the world wants.

Aquamarine is around Raymond's age but she is just as naive as Claire and Hailey, when it comes to love. The moment she sees Raymond she walks up to him and asks, “Do you love me?” The suave Raymond responds, “No, but I think you're hot.”

Aquamarine is all about young girls being at that awkward age where they are first interested in boys but do not have a clue. “When you find love, I guess it's really beautiful. I mean, that's what I've read in magazines.” Hailey espouses at one point. The movie is filled with young girl angst, “I'm never gonna see him again, and he doesn't care!”

I could not be further from this movie's target audience if you tried. I am likewise not The Princess Diaries core audience either, but that movie was entertaining. This movie is duller than a rerun of Full House. Aquamarine is a mermaid but there are very few special effects and there are no scenes filmed under water. She talks endlessly about her big, powerful father but we never see any other mer-people. Without special effects, this movie could have just as easily been about a Amish girl rebelling against her family as it is about a mermaid.