Critic's Screenings: Part One

AMC Empire 25 in Times Square is the site of many All-Media Screenings.

I've recently stopped going to Critic's screenings. When I first started being invited to these screenings, the newness and the "cool" factor of getting to see all the movies before everyone I knew made me overlook the downside of attending them. But now I find that I just no longer have the patience. I'd like to share my reasons and perhaps reveal a few trade secrets about the inner-workings of how critics see the movies that they review.

There are four types of screenings that I've been invited to here in New York over the years.

The first type of screening I'll write about, and the most most common type, is the dreaded All-Media screening. The All-Media screening is, as its name suggests, a screening of a movie for all types of media; television, radio, print and internet. They are held in regular movie theaters, usually large multiplexes, like the AMC 25 Screen theater in Times Square, although occasionally a really prestigious film will screen in the Ziegfeld, the largest and oldest Single Screen Theater in Manhattan; the same theater where many big movies have their New York Gala Premiere.

Along with all of the Media, the publicists for the film will also invite members of the public to fill up the extra seats. The idea being that if members of the public who are excited about seeing a movie before it opens and for free, laugh, cheer or cry during a movie then the Critics in the audience will pick up on that and perhaps adjust their opinion accordingly. I've also heard it said, but never proved, that the less scrupulous publicists will actually hire people or bring in members of their staff to laugh during comedies or cheer during action scenes to help give the impression that the movie is being enjoyed. As I said, I have no proof, but I know several critics who swear up and down that this is true.

The downside to the All-Media screening is that with all of those people, the theater is very crowded and you end up waiting in a line for a loooong time. At some of the screenings they will have separate lines for critics and the public, but at others you are all in the same line and so you either get to the theater an hour early or take your chances with sitting in the front row on the far left. While at most of the screenings there is a reserved section for the media, there is a strict hierarchy amongst the critics and a criteria that differs from publicist to publicist as to who qualifies for the taped off reserved section. If you're Jeffrey Lyons broadcasting your review on NBC, you get to sit not only in the reserved section but they'll reserve your seat for you. If you write for the New York Times or or some other major publication, you'll not only get to sit in the reserved section, but they'll also delay the screening until you arrive. If, however, you write merely for an online publication, you can pretty much bet that you'll be sitting outside of the tape.

All-Media screenings never start on time. Once the critics, if they're allowed to enter early (and some are ALWAYS allowed to enter early), the people manning the gate will then start to let the public in and once that happens, they will want every seat filled. This begins the long laborious process of having people walk around asking everyone to move in toward the center of the row, asking people to swap seats and of course, long lines of people trying to enter the taped off sections and the publicists frantically trying to keep them out.  Eventually, when the publicists realize that the taped off sections will never fill up, because they almost always tape off half the theater for about 20 people, they will open the taped rows and there will be a mad dash for the good seats. If an All-Media screening starts a mere fifteen minutes late, you can count yourself lucky.

Adding to the fun of the All-Media is the Security Table. After waiting in line, but before entering the theater, you are required to pass through the security. This can range from a mere glancing into your bag and a wave of a metal wand around your body, all the way up to passing through metal detectors like you'll find in an airport. Anyone with a camera cellphone, if caught, will be forced to surrender it to security who will hold it for you until after the movie. I even know one critic who was forced to check his old fashioned analog tape recorder. Apparently they were worried about Piracy for the Blind.

Perhaps the most curious aspect of these types of screenings is the groupies they have developed. There is a group of people in New York who hear about these screenings from somewhere, somehow and they show up outside the theater for all of them. They walk up and down the line asking everyone if they're going in alone and if so, can they accompany them as their guest? Some of them chat up the publicists and the critics trying to learn about upcoming screenings. One guy, whose name I do not know has been at every single All-Media screening that I have ever attended. You'd think that anyone so dedicated to seeing movies like this would start writing about them or doing something with it, but none of them that I'm aware of are interested in anything other than seeing the movie.

Since most of the big budget blockbusters are screened this way, is it any wonder that they so often receive harsh reviews from the critics? After waiting in line for a very long time, to be scrutinized by security, shuffled into a packed movie house where half the audience is there to have a good time and the other half is there to do a job, to be sitting elbow-to-elbow and possibly moved a few times before the movie finally starts 30 minutes late, you can hardly be expected to be in a positive frame of mind.